stalled

I realize it's been a long while since I last wrote.

My tomato seedlings stalled, too. They happily, quickly put out their first 2 leaves. Then, just as signs of the first real leaves began to emerge...they stalled. Nothing. Same for the peppers next to them.

I started more seeds, weeks after the first. They quickly bypassed the first, so-hopeful seeds. They're in the ground outside now, on their way to bearing real tomatoes.

So I've been wondering what did in those first sprouts. I hope it wasn't their recycled packaging. I'm excited about seed staring in old newspaper pots. I don't know what did it. I'm puzzled.

Two weeks ago, I took them out of their little pots, and put them in new (reused) plastic containers. (They have none of the charm...) The peppers have shown real signs of recovery--their little leaves move with the day's sun, and are reaching ever upward. The tomatoes, though...we'll I haven't totally given up on them, but they're still not doing much.

(Neither have they keeled over, though, which I take as hopeful.)

Problem is, failure really discourages me. I don't like to be wrong, and I don't like to fail. If I'd done something I KNEW was wrong--say, forgotten to water for a week because I was too busy tending to the world's needs--that'd be fine. I'd deal. But now I'm left in uncertainty.

I suppose that's a good spiritual discipline for this week.